15 Comments
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Gia Braia's avatar

This reminds me of the idea of queer as a way of life and not a fixed identity, i.e. you can be gay but not queer. Being queer is "to truly and joyously commit to the bit" as you put it. I agree with moving away from "splitting hairs". I've explored how some queer people, especially lesbians, may need to do some inner work to heal the insecurities, and heal from the trauma that leads to gatekeeping. We really do have bigger fish to fry!

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malavika kannan's avatar

Thank you Gia!

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Delaney Tarr's avatar

For years everyone has loved to get mad at me when i position being gay as a lifestyle choice but it is actually megaminded gender studies shit and we are so far past reductive born this way ideology… i’m so happy you wrote this it’s speaking to me…

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p_p's avatar

Omg are u Indian ?

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malavika kannan's avatar

yes tamil

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dizzy rose's avatar

Deeply related to your choice, and how you came to it 🩷 thank you for your words

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malavika kannan's avatar

thank YOU for reading!!

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Jay Walsh's avatar

You're not the only one ❤️❤️

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Thando's avatar

Did the longread, loved it. A friend of mine did the same a few years ago

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gone girl's avatar

Absolutely loved this!!

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Crimson's avatar

I thought being gay wasn’t a choice.

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Fool’s Errand's avatar

Everything is true and also meaningless

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nina's avatar

This reminds me of my fav definition of queerness. “To be queer is to be against the state” -Angela Wylie

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Fool’s Errand's avatar

>shut lib Eating carpet in 2017, but only to #Resist

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MegaRaye201's avatar

I really loved this 💙

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